(Oops, I think my reply is a tad to long winded)

But I have read words by words (I hope I haven’t missed out any).

Here are my thoughts to share.

1. We have to acknowledge that when it comes down to family matters, it is complicated. Outsiders can hardly understand what goes behind closed doors. So we have to give everybody the benefit of doubt. You may label a certain person that way but you may not have heard the story first hand from him.

2. There are two threads here. First, your friend Sia and second her mother. Solving the latter will solve the first one. BUT, it is not necessary to be that way. The key is the delink the two.

3. How to take your friend Sia out of depression? There are ways. I gather Sia may be approaching her adulthood soon? (I have no idea how old she is, or even you!). She has to be independent, both financially (kind of hard) and emotionally. Some friends of mine give tuition to earn money (just an example). And through supports from friends and advice from others, Sia can stand on her own feet. Some people do have messed up people as their parents. Sia has to learn to disassociate what belongs to her mother (be it as assets or problems) from hers. And Sia has sisters to take care of too. She has to set good example.

4. As for Sia’s mother, I personally think that it is beyond what Sia can do. Affair or related activities can be addictive, especially if Sia’s mother is still in the state of self-deception, self-denial. Does Sia’s mother has friends? Usually one way to get to a person is through his or her friends. And besides, this is a problem that Sia’s father should solve.

5. I believe in divine intervention. More so, I believe in love. Sia should continue to love her mother, even though the state her mother is in. Through love, we shall hope that Sia’s mother will one day realize that she is hurting her own children and stop what she is doing and make amend. The last thing Sia should be is to be part of her mother’s problem. Try this: come up to your mother and say, “Mother, the things that you do hurt me a great deal. I cry every night thinking of that. But I still love you. Always do.”

6. Pray. I often think that when we see dead ends or brick walls, it is the time when we need spiritual support most.

7. Love yourself. I will leave this for Sia to interpret what it means.